sunbeams and sugardrops

Posted on: May 10, 2006

Although Jakarta has been my home for almost 15 years now, every other time I left this place, I felt relieved. This time its different. This time…its hurting.Maybe its because when I come here next, if at all, things will have changed ALOT. And this time I’m leaving to start a life of my own…finally independent. And as wonderful as that thought is, there is a touch of loss. I feel like I’m losing some things that have meant so much to me, that I’ve taken for granted, leaving behind a bit of my childhood…
These thoughts have for the first time in my life made me slightly uneasy about travelling tomorrow. I’ve been flying my whole life…since I was 6 months old. I have never felt like this before. It’s even spilling into my conversations with other people…like a bad case of PMS. Everything in this house, everywhere I look in here, I feel like I’m saying goodbye for the last time…and I HATE goodbyes!

But…whatever will be, will be.

I guess thats what life is about…and its about time I got used to it.

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